Crazy Letter Thursday

Dear Mr. My house is by the School and so is my driveway,
I get that your house is in front of the school and thus people sometimes are in the way. But today you made a total arse out of yourself when upon coming home from where ever and finding someone parked in your driveway (I get that that was not cool, but an honest mistake, and it was also POURING rain)you sat in the driveway blocking all the cars around the school and proceeded to lay on your horn. You continued to act like an idiot and lay on your horn while everyone around you looked as you waved your hands in the air and whined about how someone was in your driveway. You know you easily were able to go around her and get into your driveway and garage. I mean was it really that big of a freaking deal to let this lady with her little 1st grader park in your driveway for 5 minutes? I watched you from across the street scream at this lady and then go over to the cross guard like you were going to tattle some more! Geez Mister..be a little more graceful..have some compassion for your fellow man and don't be such a pill. You were embarrassing to watch and you could have handled it sooo much differently. No matter how justified you felt, I just want you to know that you made an absolute fool out of yourself in front of everyone who was watching and that I will pray for you tonight, and ask God to lessen your burden just a little since you are obviously so stressed out that you have to go ballistic on someone for parking in your driveway on a rainy day.
Sincerely,
The Mom that told her boys how foolish that crazy man across the street was behaving.

And for my second letter to the second Idiot of the day (Myself)
Dear Jennifer,
Next time you are feeling like a stud and want to put all that weight on your bar at the 24Lift class..think twice. Your body just isn't ready to work that hard. I mean you have us on this diet and then are all out there working out too hard and killing us. Oh, by the way, thanks for stuffing us with 3 pieces of pizza last night as a reward..Thanks! Seriously, tonight when we go back to The Nazi's class..maybe be a little nicer??
Sincerely,
Your butt and thighs

3rd and Final

Dear HORRIBLE DENTIST,
Thanks a lot for being a slacker in Dental school or maybe just being lazy and not paying attention to me and my needs. Because of your in-attention to details you put a crown on my tooth incorrectly and caused me to have to get that tooth pulled out...and now to have to get an implant costing around $2000 and to make matters worse..the other crown and root canal you did was crap too! Guess who had to have 2 more root canals and 3 crowns because of it??? You guessed it..another $2000..I hope you have a great vacation as mine this year will not be happening because the money had to go to my mouth so I could continue to breathe and not get addicted to Vicodin for the pain..
Sincerely,
Jennifer "official white trash now that I'm missing a tooth" Madrigal

Finally

Dear God,
Please forgive me for being unChristian about my fellow man. I know I should pray for these individuals and I will starting right now. Love You and thanks for loving me even though these things to BUG Me. I promise to drop it and move on right NOW!
Love,
silly, hair-brained Me