Mama guilt

Okay..so we all get it at one time or another..mama guilt. You know that deep burning in the pit of your stomach when something happens to your child and even though you know its not your fault..you still feel guilty. That first face plant into the table, first spill off the porch, etc. When Andrew was sick in the NICU I struggled for months thinking it was somehow my fault, I even convinced myself that it was because I had drank Coke during my pregnancy? I know stupid..even after I found out about all of Nicholas' problems I felt that somehow someway it was my fault that he was deaf, etc. Truth is I still think that he could be better if I was better? As mothers do we ever stop feeling guilty? If we stay home we feel like we are being smothered by children and perhaps are a disapointment to our children because we are neglecting our "brains", if we work then wefeel like we are bad mothers! its a neverending cycle, but I think that if we just focus on really loving our children and making sure they know that then perhaps that will help ease the guilt..