Tuesday, August 25, 2009

update on Mom

My mom had chemo this morning and tolerated it well. She got a sudden burst of energy and was walking all over the halls and trying to eat straight off the food cart, but she is only allowed broth and jello. Eventually, my dad got her to settle down and chow down on some yummy jello and broth...mmmm..mmm. She's still pretty loopy and out of it but she's trying to stay positive and look ahead but of course, two steps forward, 4 steps back. Later in the day she pulled out her NG tube and was throwing up here we go again...Can't get her to keep the food down which makes her weak and even less able to handle and fight the cancer. My dad is hanging in there although he says he feels like he is in hell.You go to bed at night and try to fall asleep as fast as you can and then when you wake up you look around and just feel the slow creeping of grief crawl up on you and slap you hard in the face. It literally feels like someone is taking a shotgun to your chest and just blowing away. The pain is horrible and to watch your mother sit there and suffer is just unimaginable and even more so for my dad, this is his soul mate. He feels like a part of himself is being ripped from him. All we can do now is pray and hope for a miracle. So here goes some more prayers up to Heaven...

1 comment:

Julia said...

I'm sorry it's so hard. Can they give her nutrition through an IV, at least for awhile to build her strength back up?